Goal Gazette

Watch: Gabriel Jesus Scores Fantastic Goal | Arsenal 1-0 Leicester City

Following up on Charles’ analysis of the teamsheets posted by various clubs’ social media, I’d like to voice my discontent with Wolves (using a different font for the numbers, captain ©, and the word “substitutes”??) and Bournemouth. I may be blind, but those numbers seem rather hard to read.

Those images of team selections allow a comparison of PR departments’ choice of font and style,” squints Charles Antakia. “ They all go for all-caps, some (Leicester, Leeds) with generous kerning, but Man City suffocatingly tight. Fonts run a scale from boring (Bournemouth) to child-friendly (Brighton). Today’s prize goes to Arsenal, for somehow digging up a font last seen in the spaceship signage of a 1990s sci-fi series.

Aston Villa survived a late Everton onslaught, sparked by the introduction of the new signing Amadou Onana, to win their first home game of the season. It’s a perfectly reasonable question, so why do I keep reading it as: “Do you think Neil Warnock makes love to ‘I Just Called to Say I Love You’ by Stevie Wonder.

Erling Haaland literally didn’t touch the ball until the 18th minute, and that’s not an exaggeration, but his first set of touches led to a goal. He wrestled for the ball and then forced a return pass through to Ilkay Gundogan, who slapped it emphatically past Mark Travers.

Brighton’s looks like a Radiohead font, though I can’t place which one. Any idea? Leicester’s looks like it belongs on the portfolio of a start-up company specialising in eco-friendly toothpaste. Sad to see that none of the teams have gone for Comic Sans. What a humourless society we’ve become.

A lovely goal from Gabriel Jesus on his home debut.

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